MINE MINE MINE! Says the BBC over Who Knittings

The BBC has demanded that a Doctor Who fan removes knitting patterns for toys based on the Ood and Adipose ‘monsters’ featured in this series. The pattern writer argues she has done nothing  wrong but has removed the patterns anyway.

Welcome to ‘Ridiculous TV Tantrum of the Week’ (with apologies to Harry Hill) in which we learn the following :

1. The BBC has its very own Web Police, searching that evil old internet for breaches of Beeb copyright like grasping old octopi.
2. The fandom of Doctor Who crosses over with knitting enthusiasts.
3. The fruits of these Doctor Who loving Knitting Enthusiasts sometimes winds up on good old eBay and frightens the life out of Aunty’s commercial arm.

The next time you meet someone who thinks they’re very clever because they work for the BBC, remember this story. The BBC employs people specifically to make mountains out of molehills and generally bring scorn, boos of ‘spoilsports!’ and embarrassment on the organisation. Such is the situation today, when the BBC’s very own lead Entertainment story is this ridiculous row over knitting. It’s the corporate equivalent of writing ‘I’m A Twat’ on your own head, but there it is.

A 26 year old Sc-fi fan who also knits and creates patterns has published Ood and Adipose designs on her personal website, and this is apparently enough to sanction a stern email from the BBC’s commercial arm. The problem isn’t the patterns, it’s that people have used the patterns to produce the dolls and are now selling them on eBay, hovering up that lucrative Knitted Sci-Fi doll market that everyone wants a piece of. Honestly, if one of the Apprentice contestants came up with the idea of creating knitted dolls of the Who monsters they’d be laughed out of the board room.

The Knitter in question wants only to be identified as Mazzmatazz but you don’t always get what you wish for – her name is Marisa Turmaine. (The Doctor’s Lookup service is great!). Aside from her real name I now know several other things about her, where she lives, what she does for a living, where she shops etc. I know this because of the internet, because it knows virtually everything. In fact, it’s probably easier to disguise your identity using your real name, because that might be replicated. If you type Kirsty Walker into google you’ll be confronted with numerous accordion players, journalists and Scottish folk dancers, none of whom are me. When you join a forum or similar, you simply can’t have the same name as someone else, which makes Mazzmatazz as singular and unique as a lovely snowflake_78.

The BBC’s main problem with Mazzmatazz was the fact that people were selling the finished knitted dolls on eBay. A cursory check will reveal that they are no longer doing so, and that the only knitted Dr Who thing on there is a scarf made in the image of the Tom Baker special. Where are you Beeb Copyright Police! Save us!!!

All of this nonsense is very bad press for the Corporation, who now look like officious fascists stamping on the heads of creative geeks across the land. Why they chose to run it on their own news service when virtually no-one else has bothered is beyond me, but they’ve managed to stir up their very own storm in a teacup which has angered the sci-fi knitting community, and they’re a bunch you don’t want to mess with.

Posted by Kevin Beaumont on May 14, 2008. Filed under Ridiculous TV Tantrum of the Week. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.